April 2012 – Yours Beloved

One’s love story isn’t always “Girl meets someone, Girl falls in love, Girl fights and gets the person.” It isn’t some sort of fairy tale with happily ever after. It’s normally Girl meets frogs. TONS OF THEM. Girl filters frog. Girl is heart-broken. Sometimes, heart-broken so often, girl thinks, “will I ever have a chance?” Then one day, Girl is given advice by friends, “instead of falling for the same type who’ll break your heart, make a list of what you want. That way, you’ll have a physical memo that you can turn to when you are unsure of the person you’re dating.”

I admit it, I took that advice literally and actually wrote a list. Did I follow it? Not really. It was always in the back of my mind and sometimes, I get so blinded by sunshine, I don’t even remember the list. Recalling it, I had some ridiculous things on it. I don’t recommend making a list for anyone else since some of items are utterly outrageous. For example, my list had “I want a man with an accent, preferably British.” Really? I live in New York City, USA. The luckiest accent I’ll get is the South or New England. Oh, of course, he had to be 5’10” or up, considering the average height of American men is 5’9.5″.

And my other item was “he should shower me with a flower every month.” In a way, this task was meant for him to remember that I am not to be neglected. Gifts shouldn’t be given just for special occasions or as a “I’m sorry” bouquet. My roommate thinks I am crazy to demand so much. Is it? Maybe. But it’s better to know now that a man is willing to put up with one’s crazy antics and expectations than to find out later that he’s just not willing to please you.

Today, I carried my glass of tea with a flower in it and everyone asked about it. When I responded that it was part of my monthly gift, everyone asked, “how did you get your boyfriend to do that?” Mostly, I answered, “a friend told me you’ve got to train them early.” I laughed and added, “he thinks of it as a fun challenge.” It is not to say that it is a one-way gift exchange. A relationship, to me, has always been a two-way street.

Ever since I’ve placed the task on the table, I’ve been getting several great items that I thought was nice to share.